You talk to your female co-worker and she flirts with you.
You don’t want to your woman for fear that she may get jealous and upset with YOU instead of listening to the fact that you were not to blame here – at all.
Should you stick with your guns and avoid telling her for her own good or is that going to get you in trouble later on? And is it really for her own good?
The truth is that when you keep secrets from your woman it’s normally for YOUR own good.
You want to avoid getting in trouble so you don’t tell her. You want to avoid feeling bad, guilty, upset, so you keep some things to yourself. Everything you avoid telling her is for your own good, not necessarily hers.
Think about this and you will see that it’s true.
Humans rarely act without their ego in mind first. «How will this affect me?» is a question that is asked before action is taken.
But isn’t that a good thing? If you are going to be upset then doesn’t that mean she is going to be upset?
Probably. But you don’t know that for sure.
And I can tell you think for sure, without a doubt, that if you keep a secret from her for your own ego, and she finds out later on, then you are going to look GUILTY and untruthful in her eyes…whereas you just might look like a jerk if you lay it all out in the beginning.
A jerk is much easier to get over then an untruthful partner.
Suspicion about other things may start to pop up in her head and if she uncovers more secrets then you may be having to explain yourself at every turn.
To me…this is not worth the pain.
It’s better to be honest and tell her the truth right from the beginning. You will score more points with her and avoid the mistrust that always comes with keeping secrets.Of course if you are not sharing something from your past that is embarrassing then this may be an exception to the rule.
Everyone has an embarrassing moment in their past that they don’t want to share. As long as it’s not life changing for her (it doesn’t affect her in any way) then you should be allowed to keep that secret to yourself.
But once you engage in a relationship and commit to someone – keeping secrets should be thrown out the window for that day forward!